If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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