i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
