Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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