Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Randomize