Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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