She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
