I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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