Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
