Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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