thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
