I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize