So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
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