he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
