Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Randomize
