I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
there is puke in my bra ... again
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