Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
