you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
