I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Randomize
