C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
His nipple licking is glorious
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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