Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
