It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
