whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
