Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
