New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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