she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Randomize