Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
