He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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