Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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