Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize