I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
