YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
