he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize