i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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