My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
