If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize