I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
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