She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
