the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
