I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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