I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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