Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I need moral support for this bender
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
