So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
