what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
