so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Randomize