Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
