I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize