the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I don't think brook has ever known best
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
