you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
His hands were made for my vagina.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
