I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Randomize
