just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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